February 22, 2011

84 year old woman on a moped

dear donit suck you can't flag my blog diary,

doesn't it freak you out that these postings keep appearing like from nowhere and shit? it does me. sometimes i read them myself and i am like, "holy fucking batshit- this bitch is crazy as fuck," and then it hits me- oh fuck- i wrote that shit. what the fuck was i on that day? NOTHING. that is what's even worse. i can't even look and read it and go, "oh yeah- man that was some good ass weed that day man," because the ratbastards took that from me. really, it was my choice, i don't think ima get dropped on conditional court supervision discharge or what the fuckever i am on, but you just never know. little cuntface bitch got me convicted on some shit i didn't do in the first place- so anymotherfuckingthing is possible. actually i am proud of my newest conviction, i think its fucking hilarious. when i tell you what i got convicted of- you just cant help but laugh. honestly- it is the first thing i tell people when i introduce myself now. "hello, i am a whore, and i got convicted of violating an order of protection a fireman has against me. i am a bad ass bitch." it is a real conversation starter. a fireman- someone who runs into burning buildings- is scared of me. then when you start filling them in with the specific details of my case- nobody believes me. i have to get out the papers. then the pictures. then the transcripts. there will be a movie made- i promise. the shit is way tooooo fucking good for hollywood to pass up.