dear what a drastic way to say i love you diary,
oh my God would you please quit licking the floor already. all i want to do is go back to bed but i have to shake my blanket out again because the grump has mud all up in his paws everytime he jumps up on my cover and its a damned sandbox. ima kill him one of these days. i really am. if he don't just up and die first. but then i look at his big head and i am like, "oh wow, you really are a canine masterpiece," and i kiss him abruptly- he growls- and then i punch his head. i never punch him hard tho- even tho he could take it. sometimes i just grab his whole nostril and wad it up and suck the air from it. all before he can react. he don't do shit but sit there and take it like a man. then i let him go real fast and he will hump me or grab my leg with his paw. or block me from going anywhere- he likes doing that shit. he is retarded. the unibomber says i abused him when he was a puppy, but i never did. i just constantly fucked with him, babied him, razzled him, taught him things, talked to him, treated him, praised him and loved him. he is part human because of me. that ain't abuse. he has never worn a collar. never been tied to a tree. never spent a night outside. never been away from me. he loves me and i understand that- even when he shows his teeth.
oh my God would you please quit licking the floor already. all i want to do is go back to bed but i have to shake my blanket out again because the grump has mud all up in his paws everytime he jumps up on my cover and its a damned sandbox. ima kill him one of these days. i really am. if he don't just up and die first. but then i look at his big head and i am like, "oh wow, you really are a canine masterpiece," and i kiss him abruptly- he growls- and then i punch his head. i never punch him hard tho- even tho he could take it. sometimes i just grab his whole nostril and wad it up and suck the air from it. all before he can react. he don't do shit but sit there and take it like a man. then i let him go real fast and he will hump me or grab my leg with his paw. or block me from going anywhere- he likes doing that shit. he is retarded. the unibomber says i abused him when he was a puppy, but i never did. i just constantly fucked with him, babied him, razzled him, taught him things, talked to him, treated him, praised him and loved him. he is part human because of me. that ain't abuse. he has never worn a collar. never been tied to a tree. never spent a night outside. never been away from me. he loves me and i understand that- even when he shows his teeth.
