dear looking for a fax machine diary,
my dad just called. his fax machine got hit by lightning the otherday with his singing snowman statue ornament and now it wont come on either- oh and the doorbell. ima tell you what- how dare a strike of lightning fuck with my daddy. now shit always happens to my dad at tax season. it all started that one year- i stole the car and got it stuck in a ditch and the state police officer brought me and the car home- on april 16th. it sure was cold getting all hosed off in the driveway at 2am- but he said he didn't want all that mud in the bathtub- and i was covered- just like the car. had i have stolen the car on any other night- i would have been killed- but daddy was so tired from working his ass off- to get those last minute taxes and extensions to the post office- he was just relieved the car and i were back in whole pieces- and that was back in the day when cops didn't have big hardons to issue tickets for every little infraction- my little excursion cost the amount of the towing bill. i overheard him tell the cop it was his fault for, "letting me drive the tractors all the time," and it was, maybe, but he let me drive more than the tractors- i drove the cars too. i was a good driver- and still am. i just do not turn around in the muddy ditches any longer. duh. as for my dad, at least we know the rest of the year will be uneventful for him and peaceful. anything that happens to him happens during tax season. since that ends today- he's cherry.
my dad just called. his fax machine got hit by lightning the otherday with his singing snowman statue ornament and now it wont come on either- oh and the doorbell. ima tell you what- how dare a strike of lightning fuck with my daddy. now shit always happens to my dad at tax season. it all started that one year- i stole the car and got it stuck in a ditch and the state police officer brought me and the car home- on april 16th. it sure was cold getting all hosed off in the driveway at 2am- but he said he didn't want all that mud in the bathtub- and i was covered- just like the car. had i have stolen the car on any other night- i would have been killed- but daddy was so tired from working his ass off- to get those last minute taxes and extensions to the post office- he was just relieved the car and i were back in whole pieces- and that was back in the day when cops didn't have big hardons to issue tickets for every little infraction- my little excursion cost the amount of the towing bill. i overheard him tell the cop it was his fault for, "letting me drive the tractors all the time," and it was, maybe, but he let me drive more than the tractors- i drove the cars too. i was a good driver- and still am. i just do not turn around in the muddy ditches any longer. duh. as for my dad, at least we know the rest of the year will be uneventful for him and peaceful. anything that happens to him happens during tax season. since that ends today- he's cherry.