dear plea to a lesser charge diary,
admitting to anyone that i am less than perfect is somewhat hard- because i am so close to being perfect- it ain't even funny. like if i was any closer to being perfect- i dunno, i'd have to beat men off with clubs prolly. everyday i'd bet. oh that would be hard- picking who to beat off last. betcha i'd have some wicked upper body strength from all that beatin. i'd have to train myself to wait. i really suck at waiting. but i don't getta beat anybody. the desire is there, trust me. one day i will rise and snap and beat things around me. then i will feel like a greek goddess with garlic breath. i will destroy all evil mosquitoes around me. all flying and resting and sucking mosquitoes will be dead. i do hate mosquitoes because they love my sweet blood. i am a walking ice cream sundae with whipped cream and a cherry and no nuts. sometimes i want nuts, but the smell of warm nuts is nasty on a hot day. i like hot dogs plain in a soft bun- oh man do i ever. especially on a picnic or maybe at a ball game- or wherever. just spread out a blanket and under the stars- that's Heaven- knowing i'd be asleep in your arms by eleven. that's how i'd have it if your arms were mine- but then they are not- and that is just fine. because i am just perfect the way i am- so instead of a hot dog- i will have ham.
admitting to anyone that i am less than perfect is somewhat hard- because i am so close to being perfect- it ain't even funny. like if i was any closer to being perfect- i dunno, i'd have to beat men off with clubs prolly. everyday i'd bet. oh that would be hard- picking who to beat off last. betcha i'd have some wicked upper body strength from all that beatin. i'd have to train myself to wait. i really suck at waiting. but i don't getta beat anybody. the desire is there, trust me. one day i will rise and snap and beat things around me. then i will feel like a greek goddess with garlic breath. i will destroy all evil mosquitoes around me. all flying and resting and sucking mosquitoes will be dead. i do hate mosquitoes because they love my sweet blood. i am a walking ice cream sundae with whipped cream and a cherry and no nuts. sometimes i want nuts, but the smell of warm nuts is nasty on a hot day. i like hot dogs plain in a soft bun- oh man do i ever. especially on a picnic or maybe at a ball game- or wherever. just spread out a blanket and under the stars- that's Heaven- knowing i'd be asleep in your arms by eleven. that's how i'd have it if your arms were mine- but then they are not- and that is just fine. because i am just perfect the way i am- so instead of a hot dog- i will have ham.
