dear thinking about what i would do diary,
while i am up for this short period of time this morning, i could consider what i will do later on in the day once i get everything rolling. really though, that's a tough thing to do because i don't know what i want to do yet. part of me wants to go to this thing they got for this guy that died, but then part of me doesn't because that would entail getting dressed and interacting with people and i hate people. i think people should have to pay to see me. and really i'd rather just talk to them all at once. these little individual shows are so time consuming. people flock up to me and overwhelm me- and someone always gets offended that i've spent too much time over there- and ignored someone over here. i just don't even like going out anymore. that's why i like going out of town where nobody knows me and i hop on stage and i can just visit my ass off with everybody. it's much easier to connect with an audience of people than it is one person and so much safer. you can tell a whole room full of people something you could never tell a soul. it's weird how if you tell one person something specific- they can use that to try and destroy you- but if you tell a whole room full- it becomes who you are- and can make you a better, more marketable person. i'd prolly give out free tickets to people i knew- if they wanted to come to any of my shows- just to keep them from coming over to my house for a visit. at least some of them anyways.
while i am up for this short period of time this morning, i could consider what i will do later on in the day once i get everything rolling. really though, that's a tough thing to do because i don't know what i want to do yet. part of me wants to go to this thing they got for this guy that died, but then part of me doesn't because that would entail getting dressed and interacting with people and i hate people. i think people should have to pay to see me. and really i'd rather just talk to them all at once. these little individual shows are so time consuming. people flock up to me and overwhelm me- and someone always gets offended that i've spent too much time over there- and ignored someone over here. i just don't even like going out anymore. that's why i like going out of town where nobody knows me and i hop on stage and i can just visit my ass off with everybody. it's much easier to connect with an audience of people than it is one person and so much safer. you can tell a whole room full of people something you could never tell a soul. it's weird how if you tell one person something specific- they can use that to try and destroy you- but if you tell a whole room full- it becomes who you are- and can make you a better, more marketable person. i'd prolly give out free tickets to people i knew- if they wanted to come to any of my shows- just to keep them from coming over to my house for a visit. at least some of them anyways.
