dear fans on low diary,
tell me what the point is of having a fan on low? why have the bitch on. just turn it off. and maybe if you don't want me to have a conversation with the television while i am sleeping- you should turn it off while you're sleeping. i respond to things that seemingly talk to me. and look here, i don't know where that dog picked up on kissing me each time after he was done humping on me- i am fully aware that's something he didn't pick up and learn from you. you'll need to talk to the grump about that issue, but i think it is sweet. maybe you should LEARN A THING OR TWO FROM HIM. just an idea. i am quite spoiled now and i do like that. i think it is time for you to get a hair cut. enough is enough already and we can afford one. be sure to tuck it all up in a hat before you go- as not to freak the dogs out when you come home though. we've had enough stress around here. so if you could have all that done by the time i get back- i might let you live. let's recap. leave the fan alone- i like it on high to circulate the air that comes out of the air duct faster. watch tv while you're AWAKE so the tv can be shut OFF while you're asleep and i don't try and talk to the mother fucker. learn how to kiss me effectively or don't say one word to me- you do not have the skills to be jealous. and lastly, get a fucking haircut, i checked your wallet- you have plenty of money.
