dear i am hungry but i cant eat now diary,
for some reason my armpits are sticky. i wouldn't mind this but they keep sticking to me. i feel like a sandwich now, but if i stay up for another couple of hours, you guessed it, i can go to mcdonalds. i am feeling freaky already today. sometimes i wish i was a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit, because then when i got hungry i could just take a bite out of my arm. then at least my armpits would have a reason to be sticky- i eat pancake syrup on my bacon, egg and cheese biscuit. i admit to having weird quirks about my foods and or- how i eat them. i always pick the sesame seeds off the top of a bun. i heard once they can make you test positive for marijuana on a drug screen. i wouldn't want that, plus, they bother me, plus i don't like the skin on the bread- and even when there aren't sesame seeds on the top bun, i pick off all the brown- except where i hold the burger- and then if i end up eating that part- i will pick off the top of that piece too- before it goes in my mouth. i eat a big mac about twice a year and i have a special way of eating it. i almost got into trouble once eating it my 'special way.' i always take the top bun off and flip the middle bun over because three buns is just stupid on a big mac. on this day- on the highway- i threw the top bun out the window and i'll be a son of a bitch if that fucker didn't land on a state police officer's marked patrol car windshield. the cherries came on and i pulled over and met a not so amused officer- at first- but something about that bun struck him funny after a minute and finally we parted ways. i am hungry now, i could eat a cow- or an ice cream cone.
for some reason my armpits are sticky. i wouldn't mind this but they keep sticking to me. i feel like a sandwich now, but if i stay up for another couple of hours, you guessed it, i can go to mcdonalds. i am feeling freaky already today. sometimes i wish i was a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit, because then when i got hungry i could just take a bite out of my arm. then at least my armpits would have a reason to be sticky- i eat pancake syrup on my bacon, egg and cheese biscuit. i admit to having weird quirks about my foods and or- how i eat them. i always pick the sesame seeds off the top of a bun. i heard once they can make you test positive for marijuana on a drug screen. i wouldn't want that, plus, they bother me, plus i don't like the skin on the bread- and even when there aren't sesame seeds on the top bun, i pick off all the brown- except where i hold the burger- and then if i end up eating that part- i will pick off the top of that piece too- before it goes in my mouth. i eat a big mac about twice a year and i have a special way of eating it. i almost got into trouble once eating it my 'special way.' i always take the top bun off and flip the middle bun over because three buns is just stupid on a big mac. on this day- on the highway- i threw the top bun out the window and i'll be a son of a bitch if that fucker didn't land on a state police officer's marked patrol car windshield. the cherries came on and i pulled over and met a not so amused officer- at first- but something about that bun struck him funny after a minute and finally we parted ways. i am hungry now, i could eat a cow- or an ice cream cone.
