dear baking soda and listerine diary,
my first stop after that glorious bath was the kitchen sink because that is where i brush my teeth. first i got the baking soda and dumped some in the palm of my left hand and swabbed some over my gums with my right index finger to warn all the nasty scum in there that the life they knew was coming to an end. really it was to try and unglue all my teeth from my gums to prepare them for a vigorous cleaning. then i rinsed my mouth out with water and then i rinsed with the nasty listerine, a FINAL threat to evacuate before i come in with the big dogs. some people can just finish here, i cannot, i must either not come here at all or continue forward. i spit that nasty shit out and loaded my brush after a good soaking in the hottest water spraying from my faucet. let me add, the water that shoots out is so hot- you cant touch it. i pasted up and started my job, but i really didn't get down to the business- i gave my chompers all a quick scrub and my tongue a fat rub and turned off my brush and let it rinse under that hot water again and spit that shit out and rinsed my mouth out and started all over AGAIN. then i pretended i'd just arrived at the sink and prepared my toothbrush freshly for the very first time. i put it back in my mouth and scrubbed my teeth and gums and tongue and roof and now i feel so fine. i used my yummy mouthwash when i was done and i feel like a brand new person. i didn't take a nap today. so that's really somethin.
my first stop after that glorious bath was the kitchen sink because that is where i brush my teeth. first i got the baking soda and dumped some in the palm of my left hand and swabbed some over my gums with my right index finger to warn all the nasty scum in there that the life they knew was coming to an end. really it was to try and unglue all my teeth from my gums to prepare them for a vigorous cleaning. then i rinsed my mouth out with water and then i rinsed with the nasty listerine, a FINAL threat to evacuate before i come in with the big dogs. some people can just finish here, i cannot, i must either not come here at all or continue forward. i spit that nasty shit out and loaded my brush after a good soaking in the hottest water spraying from my faucet. let me add, the water that shoots out is so hot- you cant touch it. i pasted up and started my job, but i really didn't get down to the business- i gave my chompers all a quick scrub and my tongue a fat rub and turned off my brush and let it rinse under that hot water again and spit that shit out and rinsed my mouth out and started all over AGAIN. then i pretended i'd just arrived at the sink and prepared my toothbrush freshly for the very first time. i put it back in my mouth and scrubbed my teeth and gums and tongue and roof and now i feel so fine. i used my yummy mouthwash when i was done and i feel like a brand new person. i didn't take a nap today. so that's really somethin.
