dear dinner table diary,
it was supposed to be a quiet dinner with my big fresh dead bird and now we have filled the empty house next door with the biggest table ever. four more strange people have signed up to sample the biggest bird i've ever cooked in my life and i am hoping that fat bitch fits in my oven all the way. i've already decided to take everything else over yonder and cook it there in the other oven because i want that house to smell as delicious as mine, but i would never cook a turkey of that caliber in a gas oven. i have yet to mop the empty house kitchen, but i have a feeling that wont take long. usually my dad gets a big take home plate, but iffin he doesn't show up right on time- he might have slim pickins. i'm sure he wont be late. he never is.
it was supposed to be a quiet dinner with my big fresh dead bird and now we have filled the empty house next door with the biggest table ever. four more strange people have signed up to sample the biggest bird i've ever cooked in my life and i am hoping that fat bitch fits in my oven all the way. i've already decided to take everything else over yonder and cook it there in the other oven because i want that house to smell as delicious as mine, but i would never cook a turkey of that caliber in a gas oven. i have yet to mop the empty house kitchen, but i have a feeling that wont take long. usually my dad gets a big take home plate, but iffin he doesn't show up right on time- he might have slim pickins. i'm sure he wont be late. he never is.
