December 10, 2011

a happy bowl of drunken gravy

dear some get horny when they are drunk diary,

i dunno what makes people drink. i don't like the way any alcohol makes me feel. i would rather drink a warm bowl of gravy. alcohol makes some people horny and i have found that gravy makes me horny in the same way. really, any kind of meat juice does, but gravy especially makes my own personal juices flow. i love a happy drunk. i hate the smelly mean drunk. i cry and puke when i get drunk- way too much drama and trauma. yes, gravy is what makes me hot and drinking does not.