dear assuming we'll make it another four days diary,
i'm still trying to figure out what he meant this morning when he screamed, "bitch, i have a job," and i laughed in an abrupt manner which caused another more severe outburst and me to then sit on the couch for an hour. i haven't been in the living room- let alone on the couch- for months- so i sat there on top of a mound of clothes and thought to myself, "ah yes self, this must be his 'job' and we are fucking everything up and will surely hear about this later," but where was i to go? he's taken all of the kitchen chairs to the basement, sighting there's no room in the kitchen for our chairs anymore. the only place in the bathroom to sit is the toilet and i already sat there once. sometimes i sit on the floor, but my kid got a new tv and the box is in the way. i cant leave because i will prolly go fuck someone. a year ago in october i was supposed to go to jail. i decided then, "i'm done here." but then- i came home- NOT EVEN ON PROBATION and had THE luckiest year of my life. but i'm still done here.
i'm still trying to figure out what he meant this morning when he screamed, "bitch, i have a job," and i laughed in an abrupt manner which caused another more severe outburst and me to then sit on the couch for an hour. i haven't been in the living room- let alone on the couch- for months- so i sat there on top of a mound of clothes and thought to myself, "ah yes self, this must be his 'job' and we are fucking everything up and will surely hear about this later," but where was i to go? he's taken all of the kitchen chairs to the basement, sighting there's no room in the kitchen for our chairs anymore. the only place in the bathroom to sit is the toilet and i already sat there once. sometimes i sit on the floor, but my kid got a new tv and the box is in the way. i cant leave because i will prolly go fuck someone. a year ago in october i was supposed to go to jail. i decided then, "i'm done here." but then- i came home- NOT EVEN ON PROBATION and had THE luckiest year of my life. but i'm still done here.
