dear you cant burp as loud as me diary,
i just drank a whole can of soda in two swallows and burped louder than i have ever burped before ever in my life. it freaked me out. i didn't know i had it in me to make a noise like that, but i guess i do. it was fierce. i should have been born a dude. ida made one hell of a man- i'll tell you what. the things i am capable of doing- no woman should be able to do. getting stuck under my car at 9 months pregnant- changing the oil- yes- that was quite the story for the baby book. my neighbor having to come jack the car up to get me out from under it- real damn cute. that's prolly why nobody gets me any girly type gifts and shit when they gift me i bet. while all the other woman in my family would get kitchenware or fancy dishtowels and perfume, i got floormats and car wax and a chain for my wallet. i'll bet you all the money in regions bank (which prolly aint that much) that there was a pool on whether or not i'd turn out a lesbian. ahahha..... YOU LOSE! while i can appreciate women and their beauty, i can not lick a woman, therefore it would be impossible for me to be a lesbian. i did kiss one tho, once, and fucking liked that shit. and i am interested in watching another woman fuck the unibomber. i am also interested in mouth fighting over a hard penis- like playing tether ball with it until the person who wins gets 'it.' but lesbian... no way.
i just drank a whole can of soda in two swallows and burped louder than i have ever burped before ever in my life. it freaked me out. i didn't know i had it in me to make a noise like that, but i guess i do. it was fierce. i should have been born a dude. ida made one hell of a man- i'll tell you what. the things i am capable of doing- no woman should be able to do. getting stuck under my car at 9 months pregnant- changing the oil- yes- that was quite the story for the baby book. my neighbor having to come jack the car up to get me out from under it- real damn cute. that's prolly why nobody gets me any girly type gifts and shit when they gift me i bet. while all the other woman in my family would get kitchenware or fancy dishtowels and perfume, i got floormats and car wax and a chain for my wallet. i'll bet you all the money in regions bank (which prolly aint that much) that there was a pool on whether or not i'd turn out a lesbian. ahahha..... YOU LOSE! while i can appreciate women and their beauty, i can not lick a woman, therefore it would be impossible for me to be a lesbian. i did kiss one tho, once, and fucking liked that shit. and i am interested in watching another woman fuck the unibomber. i am also interested in mouth fighting over a hard penis- like playing tether ball with it until the person who wins gets 'it.' but lesbian... no way.
